Dealing With Loss
by MostEvilKitten
Summary: Single Shot, very sad. Harrys dead and Ron and Hermione have to deal with that.


A/N: This is a single shot from my achieves. I have been going through it recently and found a couple single shots and finished stories that I want to start posting again. I hope you like this one. It is actually a part of a story I wrote, but the ending is different from the story. I will post the story later, but here is a little teaser for you.  
  
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Dealing With Loss  
By: MostEvilKitten  
  
Hermione sat is the Great Hall, which was empty except for a small group of people (Sirius Black, Professor Dumbledore, and all the Weasleys, except Ginny) who all sat in silence. It was a couple of days after the school year had ended and everyone had taken the Hogwarts Express home. Hermione, herself, had just finished her fifth year at Hogwarts, but it was a year that she wish never had happened. The sad and painful memories of that year haunted her every time she closed her eyes. She could see that horrible night that everything happened as clearly as if it were only a moment ago. Remembering every detail with painful clarity. She could see Professor Snape carrying the body of one of her best friends into the hospital wing. She had been there because of a fall that had claimed the life of another student; that had also been her friend.  
  
She was having a nightmare. no it was worse than a nightmare. Where she woke up, she sat straight in her bed and looked around the quiet hospital wing and realized that she had only been dreaming, but she still had a nagging feeling in the back of her mind that told her that something was terribly wrong. She looked around again, and seeing nothing lay back into her bed laughing at herself, but the laughing stopped suddenly when she heard a terrible cry from out in the corridor. It was a cry out of utter despair and she realized whom it was coming from. "Sirius?" she whispered to herself and panic rose in her as the long shadows of the people coming down the corridor appeared in front of the doorway. She closed her eyes not wanting to know what had happened, willing herself to wake up from this nightmare, but when she opened her eyes again the desperate reality was that this was all really happening and there was nothing she could do to change any of it.  
  
She heard cries of many people coming down the corridor, and holding her breath she watched in horrible anxiety as Professor Snape stood in the doorway to the hospital wing carrying the limp body of a small boy. His unruly black hair and black rimmed glasses made him look a lot younger than he was, Hermione's heart dropped as she saw the familiar lightning shaped scar that sat on his forehead. "Harry!" she cried out. She jumped out of bed and tried to rush to him, but Madam Pomfrey and Professor Dumbledore still to weak to move so she just fell to the ground and watched as Professor Snape walked into the hospital wing followed her closely. They quickly put Harry into a bed and Madam Pomfrey rushed to and fro trying to see what, if anything, that she could do. After a moment of watching Madam Pomfrey anxiously she noticed movement from the corridor as Ron and Sirius rushed through the door and toward the area where Harry lay, but before they could make it there Madam Pomfrey stood up with a cry that made everyone stand where they were.  
  
"His dead!" she cried and almost fell to the ground if Snape hadn't caught her and place her in a chair next to Harry's bed. There came another cry, but this was from Sirius has he cried out in despair. Hermione turned to look at him and he had fallen to his knees, as did Ron. Ron was looking extremely pale with his red hair. He stared at the body of his friend as he lay there in the bed looking as through he was only sleeping  
  
Sirius now had his face in his hands and was crying. Hermione saw his body shake with the tears. "I am sorry James. Lily. I failed you." Hermione heard him whisper. She was sitting there watching everything, but was amazed at herself that she wasn't crying, she felt the tears threatening to escape, but they just wouldn't come out. As she watched everyone she notice something she had never seen before. Dumbledore. crying. A few tears escaped the Headmasters eyes has he sat down in a chair next to the bed.  
  
"NO. NO!" Hermione cried and for the first time they noticed that she was sitting on the floor. Madam Pomfrey quickly stood up and rushed to her, helping her back into bed. "What happened?" She asked and the Professors looked at her in shock.  
  
"You mean you didn't see what happened?' asked Snape. Hermione shook her head.  
  
"I was here asleep." She said. "How could I have seen it?"  
  
"Voldemort place a very powerful dark spell that made everyone in the wizarding world see what was happening. He wanted to announce his return." Said Snape and Hermione gasped at him.  
  
"You mean that wasn't a dream?" she said and placed her face in her hands. She wanted to cry, but the tears never came.  
  
"Ron?" It was Sirius talking for the first time since he got to the hospital wing. Everyone looked at Ron, who was still staring at his friend. "Ron?" Sirius spoke again, but Ron didn't move. It was as if Ron couldn't even hear him. In fact Ron looked as through every bit of his energy had been drained from him. Hermione wanted to rush over to him and hold him, but Madam Pomfrey wouldn't let her get out of bed. She looked at him and her heart broke when she saw the despair in his eyes. The total and absolute despair that made his eyes seem empty.  
  
"Mister Black would you please being him to the bed next to." She couldn't finish the sentence. Sirius stood and Hermione saw his face, stained from the tears that were falling silently. He picked up Ron as if he were a rag doll and placed him into the bed next to Harry. Ron looked so small and every pale as he lay there in the bed staring at nothing.  
  
"Where's Ginny?" Hermione finally realized that someone was not there. They all looked at her with sad expressions and Hermione knew why. Ginny was still missing.  
  
Hermione closed her eyes; she didn't want to think about that night anymore. Instead another memory appeared. It was a couple of days after that night when all of the Weasleys (expect Ginny) were sitting in the hospital wing, watching Ron, who was sitting in a chair next to the bed where Harry's body lay, looking as if he was only sleeping. Ron had been sitting in the chair since the day after Harry died. He hadn't spoken to anyone, even when his parents and brothers got there. All he had done was stare at his friend. George and Fred tried to cheer him up by bringing some of their jokes for him, but nothing seemed to work.  
  
Hermione tried to talk to him and hold him, but there was no reaction to anything she said or did. That day Mrs. Weasley took her aside, her eyes were puffy from crying and her voice wavered as she spoke to Hermione. "Arthur and I discussed it last night." Said Mrs. Weasley, as tears ran down her face. "And we are afraid if Ron doesn't come out of this. this stupor that we might have to take him to St. Mungo's." Hermione nodded to her slowly. Everything around her seemed far way, and it was all too much to take in. Classes had resumed as normal, but exams had been canceled. Hermione had gone to all of her classes as normal, because she didn't know if she could of kept her sanity if she didn't. No one wanted to speak to her, because when they would they would start to cry and had to leave the class too stop crying, but that wasn't the only reason why no one was talking to her. It was because she hadn't cried herself. They all thought something was wrong with her. Her best friend died and she was walking around like nothing was wrong. She didn't mind much, because that left her in silence where she wanted to be.  
  
Every meal in the Great Hall was silent, and seemed very empty. Whenever she sat down there were always two empty places beside her, Ron and Harry. There was also one empty space in front of her were Ginny would sit, and a little down the table Neville's empty space was where between Dean Thomas and Lavender Brown. Hermione felt so alone, she had no one to talk to, no shoulder to cry on, all she had was the copies of the Daily Prophet; that she would read.  
  
The Wizarding World Mourns  
  
The wizarding world mourns over the death of two young wizards. Neville Longbottom who tragically fell in an accident and soon after that Harry Potter died saving the life of his best friend Ronald Weasley, when You- Know-Who kidnapped them both to announce his return to our community. No one mourns more than the Weasleys who consider Harry a member of their family. Also the youngest Weasley, Virginia Weasley is still missing. "We are hoping that she is well, but she was last seen with." Arthur Weasley was quoted saying at the press conference last night at the Ministry. The recently acquitted Sirius Black, Harry's godfather refused to comment on the death of his godson. No one can blame him. The funeral will be held on Hogwarts grounds two days from now. Harry will be buried in Hogwarts private cemetery in a closed ceremony. Harry Potter will receive that Order of Merlin for all his many efforts to stop He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, in his short year. He is the youngest person ever to receive this honor. It is reported that the maker of chocolate frogs will be making a card in Harry's honor and it will be released on his up coming birthday. No one has heard anything from You-Know-Who as of yet, but everyone is waiting with anxiety to see were he will strike first. Is this the clam before the storm?  
  
Hermione never like the press, but she tore out the article and had always kept it on her since that day. She was holding it in her hands as she sat next to Sirius at the funeral that had been in the Hogwarts private cemetery, where Godric Gryffindor, Rowena Ravenclaw, and Helga Hufflepuff were buried, along with a few other wizards and witches that Hermione had remembered studying about in History of Magic class. She sat there wondering what future students at Hogwarts would think about Harry when they would read about him in their textbooks. Would they think that he was a hero? That would all be decided on who won the up coming war that everyone feared. Hermione sat and wondered about the fate of the world as everyone around her cried. She still couldn't. She was barely aware that people were talking as she stared at him for the last time. She stood over his coffin staring down at his flawless face. He was wear the gold medallion that they gave Sirius when Harry was given the Order of Merlin first class, it now lay on the red Gryffindor Quidditch robes that he wore. Sirius didn't want to keep it, it would remind him too much of the innocent boy that saved him from the nightmare of Azkaban, the wizards prison. Another thing that was going to be buried with him was his wand. Harry loved that wand so much, so they thought it only proper to let it stay with him forever along with his broom, the Firebolt lay beside Harry never to be used again. Hermione placed her hand on his cheek and wished to herself that he would wake up. She wanted him to open his eyes and wake up so that she could see his emerald green eyes one last time.  
  
"Wake up!" she screamed at him, and everyone watched in shock as she started to cry. "Wake up Harry!" Tears were finally streaming down her face as she shook Harry's body desperately tried to get him to wake up, but he never did. "Harry wake up!" she let go of Harry and fell to her knees. "Please." tear stream down her face and she didn't have any strength left in her body. She curled up into a ball next to the coffin and cried. The floodgates of her tears had been opened and she didn't know how long she had been there crying before a pair of strong arms lifted her off the ground and carried her back to her seat. She looked up to see who it was, and she looked straight into Sirius' eyes. There was so much pain in his eyes that she couldn't look at them any longer. She buried her head into his chest and cried, as she sat in his lap as if she was a little child sitting in her father's lap crying. The Minister of Magic, Cornelius Fudge spoke last about how Harry was the finest person he had ever met and that he was going to delicate a new Ministry building in his name. That was the last day that anyone saw the Minister of Magic, alive. He had dropped of the public eye after that day, and was removed as Minister a few days later. Arthur Weasley was named Interim Minister for now, while they worked to make him the Minister or they found someone else. Hermione couldn't remember much more of the funeral after that.  
  
The next memory Hermione thought of was a couple of days after the funeral when she was walking to her last Transfigurations class of the year. She was always the first student in the class to walk in, so that she could get a seat in the back so that no one could stare at her. As she headed for the door she noticed Professor McGonagall walking towards her heading for her classroom, her eyes were puffy and Hermione knew that she had been crying again like many of the other students had. Professor McGonagall looked up and noticed Hermione standing at the door waiting. "My dear is there anything you would like to talk about." Professor McGonagall spoke in a soft voice. Hermione shook her head. It was her turn not to speak, and she hadn't all week, not since the funeral. People were starting to get really worried about her when she didn't raise her arm in class and answer all of the Professor's questions.  
  
Professor McGonagall smiled at her and entered the classroom, but stopped just inside the door when she noticed that they weren't the first people to get there. Hermione came in and gasped. Ron was sitting in a chair at the back table. Hermione talked up to him. "Ron?" but Ron didn't answer her. He just stared at the back wall as he had done for the last two weeks. Professor McGonagall was about to go get someone to take him back to the hospital wing when Hermione asked her not too. Hermione thought that it would be better for Ron to be around other people for a while, and Professor McGonagall reluctantly agreed.  
  
The other students came into the class shocked to see Ron there. A couple of the students rushed to speak with him, but when they noticed that he didn't answer, they bowed their heads and walked away even more depress than before. The class was going by slowly as everyone wanted to get done with their last class of the year and start getting ready for the farewell feast, when something happened. Ron spoke.  
  
"It should have been me." He said softly at first and only a couple of people around him heard what he said, they all burst into tears. Hermione turned to Ron and put her arm around him, but there was no reaction, as if he didn't even notice that she was there. Professor McGonagall turned to Ron.  
  
"Did you say something Mr. Weasley?" asked Professor McGonagall. There was a hint of hopefulness in her voice that Ron was starting to talk again when it was dash as Ron spoke one more time.  
  
"It should have been me." He said in a louder voice. Professor McGonagall looked at the boy with a tear running down her check. She had to cancel the rest of the class, because no one, not even her, could finish. Hermione had to help him back to the hospital wing where Madam Pomfrey had a look of relief when she saw him. She had told Hermione about how he was talking in his sleep; that he blamed himself for Harry's death. She was afraid that he saw going to do something 'stupid' because of that. Hermione sat a while with her boyfriend. She wanted nothing more that to take away all his pain, so that she could talk to him. She started to cry again as she realized that he might not come out of the 'stupor' that he was in; that she was going to visit him at St. Mungo's. She left completely alone. Harry was death, Ron couldn't hear her, and Ginny was still missing. All of the people that she cared about were gone, and she was there all alone. It was the first time Hermione ever wished that she was dead. She sat there a long time wishing that she could join Harry with his parents in the afterlife, because she couldn't live a second longer feeling the pain that was growing in her day by day. Tears rolled down her face as she stared at Ron in his bed, able to response to anything she did.  
  
She left the darkness looming out in front of her. A place where she didn't have to feel anymore, the place where Ron was right now, she could see it, she could feel it. She wanted to go there, to make it all stop, so that she wouldn't feel the pain of being alone anymore, so that she could have some peace and not be haunted by Harry's smiling face and his laughter. For that is what she heard and saw every time she tried to sleep, but she couldn't stand it anymore and started to put Wakefulness Charms on herself so that she wouldn't sleep. In fact she hadn't slept in over three days, and the bags under her eyes were getting bigger and bigger. She wanted it all to stop. She wanted to finally be able to sleep in peace. She was going to surrender to the darkness, when she heard yelling coming from the door of the hospital wing. It was Jamie Bower, a fourth year Slytherin girl. She was arguing with Madam Pomfrey, and Hermione could only hear a little of what was said.  
  
"But I have to speak with Ron Weasley, it is important!" yelled Jamie.  
  
"Mr. Weasley is in no condition to speak with anyone right now Mrs. Bower, so why don't you just tell me what you want and I will deliver the message when he is well again." Said Madam Pomfrey calmly.  
  
"You don't understand it is important, and I have to speak with him personally!" Jamie's voice seemed desperate.  
  
"I cannot allow you to see Mr. Weasley at this time." Said Madam Pomfrey.  
  
"Fine." Said Jamie and with that she ran down the corridor. Hermione could hear her cries for a while, until Jamie was too far away. Hermione didn't realize it then, but Jamie had saved her from something far worse than death, when she yelled at Madam Pomfrey that day.  
  
Hermione remember the farewell feast next. The Great Hall was decorated the same way as the year before when Cedric had died. The Gryffindor table was silent, and no one wanted to speak a word to break the silence that seemed so appropriate. Ron was allowed out of the hospital wing to take part in the farewell feast, but all he did was stare at the empty plate in front of him as his brothers George and Fred shot depressed glances at him. Hermione felt a little better than she had been in a while as she sat in the Great Hall with Ron next to her, she didn't seem as lonely as she had before, although there still were two empty chair at the Gryffindor table.  
  
When Professor Dumbledore stood to speak everyone looked at him in wonder at what he would say to finish the year. "Another year is gone, and like any year, it has been full of happy moments as well as sad ones. This year has been full of sad moments and no house has felt that more than the Gryffindor house. There are two empty chairs at the Gryffindor table that should be full right now. There are three people that aren't here that should be here celebrating the end of the year with us, but they are not. We all have lost much this year. Professor Smith has been discovered to be a Death Eater, and we have lost another of our Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers. After Professor Smith attack on Hermione Granger she fled, but we are glad to see that Hermione is well now, that is a blessing." There was a long pause as everyone turned to look at Hermione, who sat with her head bowed and tears streaming down her face.  
  
"Voldemort kidnapped three of our students. Ronald Weasley is here with us. Ginny Weasley is not among us, and no one knows where she is. We all hope and pray that she will be found soon, alive. Harry." Professor Dumbledore's voice wavered and tears threatened to show themselves. Hermione heard cries from around the room as the Professor struggled to regain composer. Before he continued Hermione watched as couple of the other Professors excused themselves from the table unable to stop from crying, Professor McGonagall was among them. Hermione looked at the other Professors still sitting at the table. Professor Flitwick was sitting there with tears in his eyes, but he sat straight trying to look as if he wasn't going to cry. Hagrid was sitting at the end of the table and Hermione couldn't tell if he was crying, because of his bushy bread, although his eyes were red and watery. Hermione felt another wave of tears in her throat. Hermione's eyes fell on the last teacher at the table, Professor Snape, Hermione doubted every much that Snape had shed a single tear for any of her friends, but when she looked at him she stared in wonder, as she saw a tear rush down his face. That was it for Hermione; she started to wale at the top of her lungs.  
  
"Harry!" she yelled in agony. She put her face in her hands and cried, just cried. She felt a hand on her back, Ron's hand, which made her cry even more. She felt as if she was never going to stop crying again. She didn't notice Hagrid until he took the empty seat next to her, Harry's seat. He pulled her close to him and she cried into his coat. She felt it as big tears fell into her hair and she knew that Hagrid was crying. It took awhile for the cries to stop, but when they did Professor Dumbledore continued.  
  
"Harry Potter died a hero, saving the life of his best friend. He face Voldemort unafraid of what might happen to him, but afraid of what would happen to others. He fought Voldemort with every last bit of strength that he had, and died in the struggle. I urged you to always remember Harry as a hero. He saved so many life in his short years and now we should honor him." Dumbledore pause as he picked up his glass and raised it to the sky. "Harry." He said.  
  
"Harry." Echoed the students, and Hermione was aware that most of the Slytherin table cheered Harry but there was a small group that stayed in their seats. Hermione looked up at Dumbledore, and she saw that he noticed the Slytherins that didn't join the toast, and for a second his eyes lit with fury and then died away as tears fill his eyes again. That was the last memory Hermione wanted to remember. She looked back at the small group that was sitting in the empty hall with the Daily Prophet article in her hands. All of the other students had gone home a couple of days before, and Hermione wanted to go home as well, so that she could sit up in her room in silence.  
  
"Albus," said Arthur Weasley. "We are going to take Ron to St. Mungo's tomorrow to see if there is anything that can be done for him." Everyone looked at Ron who was still sitting staring into space.  
  
"I think that is best Arthur." Said the Professor, who looked at Hermione with a sad expression. No one spoke after that. Hermione wanted to go to Ron and shake up him she shook Harry at his funeral, but she was afraid that it might have the same affect has it did with Harry.  
  
"We don't know what to do now, Albus. It is just that. Ginny." said Molly Weasley.  
  
***  
  
Ron was barely aware that someone was speaking, as he had been barely aware of anything in the last two weeks. He could remember running into the hospital wing after Snape had took Harry there. His whole body ached from what had happened to him that night. He was worried that Harry had died, no not worried that is the wrong word. He knew in the back of his mind that Harry was death, but he need someone to say it, but that wasn't the only thing that Ron was worried about. Ginny. He didn't know where his sister was, and he felt that it was his fault that she wasn't there with him. He should have gone back to get her, to find her. No matter how many Death Eaters where there, no matter if Voldemort wanted him dead, he had to go back, but Snape was pulling him to the portkey. He had lost his sister and if anything had ever happened to her, he would never be able to forgive himself, but right now he ran as fast as he could right behind Sirius to the hospital.  
  
He saw Harry in a bed surround by Professors and glanced over at Hermione for a moment and saw that she was on the floor of the hospital wing stared at Harry. Ron was just about to rush to Hermione to help her up then he heard Madam Pomfrey cry out. Ron stopped dead in his tracks, as Madam Pomfrey proclaimed at Harry was dead. Ron feel to his knees and the darkness took him quickly. All he could see was Harry lying in the bed as if he was only sleeping.  
  
"Its all my fault." Ron heard a voice that sounded like his echoing in his head. "Its all my fault." It kept repeating over and over again. Ron didn't hear Sirius speaking to him and was barely aware that he was being picked up from where he sat on the ground. Even when he wasn't looking at Harry, he could still see him, but it was Harry in his bed, it was Harry standing in front of him as he save his life.  
  
Ron saw the green light of the killing curse rushing towards him and he stood there waiting for it to hit him, but it never did. When he saw Harry standing in front him looking at Ron, a fear Ron had never felt before hit his heart. Harry's eye flew wide and his body jerked forward as the killing curse hit him in his back. Harry body flew forward and the weight of it knocked Ron to the ground. Ron knew then that Harry was dead. The scene of Harry's death played over and over again in his head and he lost track of time, as if it didn't exist anymore. Day and night seemed to be one as Ron sat in the darkness that consumed him. When he slept he saw Harry dying, when he was awake he saw Harry dying. He couldn't get it out of his head.  
  
"Its all my fault." The voice repeated over and over again until it was the only thing he heard. One day he found himself in Professor McGonagall's class, and he didn't know how he got there. "It should have been me." He said not really knowing that he said it out loud.  
  
"Did you say something Mr. Weasley?" asked Professor McGonagall.  
  
"It should have been me." He said again, and the darkness took him again. Harry was there again, standing in front of him and falling forward again. Ron wasn't aware of anything else until him heard Hermione cry out Harry's name and he heard her crying. At the corner of his mind he made himself put his hand on her back to comfort her. It was all that he could do, but now the scene of Harry's death played over and over in his mind, and he just wanted it to stop.  
  
***  
  
"I am sorry Hermione dear." Mrs. Weasley said as they all got up for the table. "We have to take him now." Hermione look at her boyfriend, whose blank stare sent a chill up her spine. She leaned in and kisses him softly on the forehead. There was no reaction. Tears slid down her face once again as she let Mr. Weasley pick up his son and carry him from the Great Hall. They had gone a long time before Hermione moved again. When she looked around the Great Hall again everyone had gone except Sirius, who was standing a window staring out at the graveyard where Harry now rested.  
  
"Sirius?" she called softly to him.  
  
"Yes Hermione?" he answered without looking away from the graveyard.  
  
"Is there anything. anything you need?" she asked him as she walked towards him.  
  
"No, but thanks." He said and looked at her. "I think it is about time that you should be getting home."  
  
"I want to say goodbye to Harry first." She said and Sirius nodded. They walked down to the graveyard together, as neither one of them wanted to be alone just yet. They walked up to the tombstone with Harry's name on it. It was a simple tombstone; it only had his name and two dates written on it. There were flowers and other assorted things lying around his grave. Hermione gave a small smile when she noticed a bag of the Weasley twin's jokes and gags lying at the foot of his tombstone with a small note that read. "You may need this." Hermione could see Harry playing tricks on his parents in the afterlife. That was when it really hit her. Harry was gone, forever, and he wasn't coming back. Ron had gone into his own world or darkness, where he was constantly blaming himself for Harry's dead and she was alone. She thought about the next year. There would be no one there for her. Her two best friends were gone and she was left behind to pick up the shattered pieces of her life and try and put them all back together, but she honestly didn't know how to do that. She felt completely helpless.  
  
"Goodbye Harry." She said, but now the pain didn't seem as bad. There was a calm about her, and she knew that someday everything was going to be all right, but she just didn't know how to get there.  
  
End 


End file.
